Photos!

I'm going to put more photos on here as soon as we're settled in at home! We don't even have the internet yet and I still have to find my computer so as soon as I get it all sorted out there are going to be some of Mummy's fine photography!!!

First trip to the zoo!

We're back in England for a week at the Grandparents' and yesterday for the first time Flavio saw some 'real' animals! He loved watching the giraffes which is also the theme of his bedroom at home and he saw the lions first which he laughed at and pointed to. The weather wasn't perfect and he got sleepy in the afternoon so he didn't see it all but he was definitely impressed!
I bought him a squeaking monkey souvenir which he attaches to his quadbike and rides around the kitchen with! He now does stunts on his quadbike, standing on the seat with one hand on the handlebars!
The Gramps adore him! 

Growing up

He's growing up and already walking quite well. He just loves walking, he could walk for miles. If there's not a lot of room he'll just walk in circles! Whatever he does he has to be on the move.
He waves his little hand and says "Hiiii!" Even when people say "Ciao!" to him he'll reply with a cute little Hi!
I'd love to write here more often. I just wish I had the time, I wonder when I'll ever have time on my hands again to capture these little memories and enclose them forever in this blog. My baby is growing up and everything he does amazes me and gives me so much inspiration to record it here but after a while that little memory vanishes and doesn't have the same effect looking back with just little glimpses of recollection. I want to change it all into words and celebrate this beautiful time of my little angelcake and never forget what a blessing I've received.
He's become so affectionate, kissing and hugging and making sweet sounds whenever he sees a teddy bear or a picture of a little animal. He grabs me around the neck and kisses me with such force!
I love the person he's becoming.
I love our quiet times together.
I love spending all day with him and having his presence in every little thing I do.
I love lying in bed and remembering the day we've spent together when he's fast asleep in his cot and thinking that it's the only company I could ever stand that long.
He has his little tantrums too, his feistiness and his off days of course but I've learnt to handle these moments the best I can and I'm forever learning to teach him what I feel is the best way to go about certain situations.
Times are hard at the moment. We've just moved into our new house and we don't even have a sofa yet. I have to start studying again for the last year. I have so much to do but he is always the priority. I could never neglect him. Until he needs me, I'll always be there and even after that...

Flavio's first steps

Just a few minutes ago Flavio took his first steps while playing with Daddy! Maybe for the excitement of playing with his Daddy while Mummy finally relaxes for an evening in front of the computer (which never usually happens!) I couldn't believe it but when I went up to Flavio who was stood by the sofa and held out my arms he took at least four steps and then fell into my arms! I was wondering when it was finally going to happen: he seemed just so keen on crawling that I thought he'd just decided to skip that milestone!
It's such a stressful time at the moment we're in the process of moving house: we've actually moved but the house isn't just ready yet so the constructor of the house is letting us stay in a beautiful 'casale' in Tuscany which is really nice but I have all those boxes niggling away in my mind to be put away and I just want to have my house! Here we have no internet and I feel quite secluded even though there are a few other families around but I have to admit it is a beautiful place. The views are fantastic and the house is typical Tuscan style in a complex with a swimming pool and paths to take walks... There are only a few things missing on the new house like the bannister on the staircase and a couple of wash basins but they can't let us in until it's all finished.
I've just put Flavio to bed and I told him how proud of him 'Mamma' is that he's finally taken those first steps! He calls me 'mamma'. All day I hear 'mamma!' 'MAMMA!' At 13 months he associated mamma to me and started calling me all the time. It's so sweet and it's the milestone I've enjoyed the most until now! 

First kiss!

I can't believe what just happened and I feel so moved by it! Flavio actually kissed me! And once he started he wouldn't stop! I'd just finished changing him for the night and I'd put him into a fresh body suit and he was stood up on my legs hugging me. Daddy was sat next to us. I was telling him about how he always hugs me tight after his bath time and how cute it was and suddenly he looked right at me aimed for my mouth and gave me a big sloppy kiss on my lips! He made the kiss sound too! So cute to hear! Then he looked right at daddy for his reaction. We praised him for it and then he did it again and turned to see our reaction. Then he hugged me tight and kissed my cheek lots of times, sloppily with his tongue out but it was definitely a kiss! A cluster of kisses. Daddy asked for one too, and after a few smacks he got one too on his cheek. What an affection little darling at barely one year old! The funny thing is I didn't teach him to kiss or even ask for one! I love people who display signs of affection and now I'm so glad it seems Flavio is an affectionate person.

The summer holiday period is over and I'm back to update this little blog after a few weeks with no internet connection. We've been a few weeks by the sea and a week in the mountains. The rented apartment by the sea wasn't really classed as a holiday as the cooking and cleaning involved was quite hard work seeing as 'Dad' was working a lot of the time and I was completely alone! The week in the mountains in Val Gardena was a real holiday in a hotel where after long walks we came home to hot meals on the table!

Flavio has loved this holiday period and has learnt so many new things. He now crawls, marathon style. I never thought he'd be a crawler because he was never interested in being on his front and at eight months he'd pull himself up onto his feet. Well what do you know! At nearly 11 months he starts crawling after a few attempts at walking. He's stayed up on his feet for a few seconds but then falls right down as soon as he notices what he's doing. I think he'll be walking quite soon as he is crusading on the sofa and around the table. He recently started greeting people with the cutest 'ciao' and hand wave ever. At the restaurant of the hotel he'd greet everybody and he made so many admirers that at meal times everyone would ask for 'Flavio'. It's not really a hand wave. He opens and closes his hand accompanied by a sweet 'ciao' or even 'hi'. He's also started pointing. He points and says 'there' and you have to explain what it is or go there. He's become a Mummy's boy, he only wants to be in Mummy's arms and Daddy is getting quite jealous. Poor Daddy, he does try hard but I suppose Mummy is Mummy..

Flavio's first birthday is getting closer and it's come way too soon. I was dreading this moment, thinking I was going to lose my little baby but I have to admit I'm enjoying him so much more with every day that passes.

Us two

10 months today!

My little prince is 10 months today. I cannot believe how time has whizzed by no other ten months of my life have ever gone so quickly. My life is just a whole routine of feeding, changing, entertaining and waking up through the night! There again, no other ten months have been so exhilarating, emotional or overwhelming.
In a way I feel sad as he moves on up there towards his first birthday. I don't want him to get older, he's my little baby and growing up means growing away from Mummy, getting independant. I do, however, believe in teaching him independence and respecting his wills and desires in life. I think there's nothing worse than forcing your child into being someone YOU want him to be, obliging him to be like you.
He's developing so fast, he does so many new things now. One thing that I think is particulary cute is that he's starting to show emotions for things he likes and if you take something away from him or take him away from somewhere he likes he'll start to cry. I know it seems so banal but we thought it was so cute how the other day we put him on a little ride in the shopping centre (a loony tunes shopping van) that moved up and down and played music and when it had finished and we took him out of the van his beaming little face turned serious and he got so upset that it was time to go. I was tempted to pay for another ride on it but A said not to otherwise it may lead to spoiling him!
He pulls himself up easily in his playpen now and holds on with one hand while he bobs up and down and picks up toys. He's also got easier because he's starting to invent his own little games whilst he's in the playpen so that leaves me a bit more time to get jobs done. He'll pick up two little teddy bears and bash them together whilst babbling baby talk at them and the funniest thing he does is when he's in his little car in the garden. He's worked out where the pegs are; in a little sac that hangs from washing prop. He puts a hand in a fishes around for pegs and he always pulls two pegs out and puts one in each hand and scurrys around in his car with his hands in the air!
He's so cute I just can't take my hands off him. I'm constantly kissing and cuddling him and shouting out 'Ti amooo' ( I love you) and tickling him, he has THE cutest laugh ever. Today I took him to the supermarket (he goes on all my errands with me, such good company!) and I just went into a bit of a silly mood and I pulled some faces at him and he was laughing his little head off! When I added some silly noises that got him even giddier! He's so good too, he'll behave so well if ever I decide to look around a few shops and everyone always comments on how gorgeous he is! I know he's my son and I don't want to blow my own trumpet but I have to record the fact that he gets so many compliments. Mainly because if anyone speaks to him, he'll have a beaming smile on his face straight away. He loves people and company and he also loves watching other little children.
What can I say? He's perfect and I couldn't ever begin to describe how much I love him.

There's no place like home

Sometimes I just close my eyes and want to go back to the days I felt loved, secure, peaceful-minded and 'at home'. It takes me back to the first house I lived in with Mum, Dad and my brother. I have so many happy memories of that sweet, happy, smoothly-run family home. Back to the days of innocence where everything was so easy and what wasn't; someone else took care of. I feel like this when I get overwhelmed with the responsibilities of being a mother of a baby and a partner who can sometimes seem like a baby too.
I want to create this sweet family home for Flavio too but sometimes it seems as if our ideas are so different. Being quite a quiet, peace-loving person I tend to let others get the better of me but I'm so passionate about this concept. I want this family to work. I want to raise happy children that feel secure in their family nest. It's hard trying to create this with someone who hasn't grown up in a happy family environment and hasn't experienced this family bond that I have. A really wants to participate in the search towards family happiness but his past is his biggest obstacle. How can you set standards that haven't been set for you? How can you aspire to reach a type of happiness you have never felt? A listens to my stories of happy family holidays and little memories that pop into my head now and again and he loves hearing these things but he has never told me a single happy memory from his past. This makes me sad. He must harbour a lot of sorrow.
It's hard trying to bring up a child with someone from a different nationality and even harder with someone who has quite a background of family break-ups. The most important thing is, though, that he loves us and he is working with me to achieve this goal of a happy, united family.
I can't believe Flavio is going to be 9 months old in four days time. Where does the time go? He has TWO beautiful bottom milk teeth and is getting way too heavy to be carried all the time. If he doesn't start walking soon I'll start turning into a hunch-back! He now tries to pull himself up on me when I'm sat on the sofa and he pulls up into standing position. I think he'll skip crawling. He doesn't know what to do when he's on his front.. he just spins around on his tummy!

So many changes, so little time!

He consumes my time and energy, he's a 24 hour, round the clock job - but one of those jobs you love. I have to neglect everything; friends, hobbies, potential jobs (even stay at home ones) because he requires my every waking moment. I'm itching to start reading a book or to start work on an article I've been meaning to write for a while now but I can't, I just can't! If I'm not preparing his food or feeding him, I'm changing his nappy, washing him, doing his washing, buying his supplies, entertaining him or just sat on the sofa next to him nursing my sleep deprived headache while he clings on to my trousers trying to pull himself onto my knee! It's hard work! It's tiring! I don't have any help from family members which makes it a lot harder because even an hours free moment a day would help so much. There again I wouldn't really like comments and recommendations that including other family members would entail. I can do it! After all, it's the best job in the world!
He's now asleep in his swing, yes, he still likes his swing even though legs and arms spill over the sides and the battery runs out ever so fast due to those whopping ten kilos it has to swing back and forth! A moment's peace! I can finally write in this blog and keep it updated.
Flavio has a tooth! At seven months his little bottom tooth on the right hand side sprouted and is oh so cute. He is teething so badly, he always has to bite on something and dribbles like a waterfall, I'm forever changing bibs. Recently he's not been so well, he had a fever for 4 days in a row followed by a nasty rash all over his body which the pediatrician informed us is the Sixth Disease. The trouble is the rash is itchy so he's always trying to roll and wrythe to scratch himself seeing as he doesn't know how to scratch properly with his nails yet. He was in a lot of discomfort yesterday, it must have been so itchy and he didn't sleep that night either. The ped prescribed some antihistamine drops but they don't seem to work that well as he still rubs his head and body on things after I've given them to him.
I had some friends stay over at my house a few weeks ago and it was so good to have this company for a few days. I needed a change. Flavio was so well behaved, he enjoyed being smothered with attention by his 'aunties'! I even took him to an art gallery and he was so good, he's such a good baby when we're out and about, it's like when I take him on the plane, he's as good as gold.
Well, he's seven and a half months old and life is good. It's so wonderful having a little baby, just that most of the time you're too tired to enjoy it. Like now! Sorry, I have to shoot off, he's woken up and is shouting 'ba ba baa'...

Sitting in the garden

The little hero is making so much progress!

He's like a hurricane. Every day he discovers something new and amazes me how his evolving mind is taking in the world. At just five months he sits up unassisted and loves being sat up so he can play properly with a toy. I discovered he could do this just by sitting him up and tripodding his hands so he steadied himself. He looked really hunched forward at first but I realised I was doing something right because he didn't complain at all and seemed content sat there like floppy bent over teddy bear. I was shocked at the progress he had made; just a couple of times after putting him in this position he actually looked less hunched and was able to pick up his toys and play with them (even after a few crash landings where Mummy had to come and save the day and put him back in his sitting postion). Just a day after this he sits up without tripodding his arms and has a straight back. He now takes advantage of his play mat and spends more time on his own discovering new things with his own sensory skills. I really didn't think he would learn to sit up so fast, I'm so proud of him. He always did have strong back muscles though because at just two months he would hold up his head and straighten his back whilst being held.
Now during the day he spends most of the time sat up! He likes his little walker too. He can't stand being laid down anymore, it's almost as if he's saying 'I'm a big boy now Mummy, stop laying me down!'
The speed at which he's improved manualitly is also astronomical. It seems like he went from just briefly touching a toy to actually handling it and feeling it overnight! He now grabs toys and inspects them and taps them on things to discover sounds and pressure, he's just amazing. A little head full of mutliplying explosive brain cells!!!
In the swimming pool baby has learnt to go underwater and is now so confident in the water. He forever splashes with his little arms and has received so many compliments from other Mummies at what a good swimmer he is. I'm so glad I enrolled him onto these swimming lessons, it's one of the best things I've done for him so far. He's even got a little friend who is the same age as him and with whom he enjoys splashing!
The last couple of weeks it's been unusually warm for the time of year in Rome. Short winter days full of sunshine and mild weather. It's so uplifting to be able to sit out in the garden or on the terrace at the beginning of February and actually sunbathe. I've put a sheet on the lawn where I sit baby with some toys. He loves being outside. I put his little walker on the terrace too while I sit and sunbathe (a few minutes at a time..)
A note to my little baby,
Mummy adores you Flavio, as soon as I have the time and energy I'll write a little letter that you can cherish forever like this blog. I want to remember all the little things you do. You're my little angel and every waking hour spent with you is so special. A big, virtual, timeless kiss! xxx

First proper lunch-time!

Today baby bean had his first ever 'meal'. He'd been eat a quarter of a fruit a day all this week working up to his first proper meal time. We bought the Chicco food processor last week. It was a really good buy. He's been eating blended apples and pears, having his taste of what it's like eating like a 'grown up'.

We bought all the vegetables and food on the list that our pediatrician gave us last week. We also bought some weighing scales and a new chopping board and a grater. A went to work at one and left me preparing his first 'broth' all by myself. A few chopped up carrots, a chopped up potato and a lettuce leaf! I had to leave it on a low flame for forty minutes then add a couple of teaspoons of baby rice granules. Bean was super excited, it was as if he knew what I was cooking was for him. He kept eyeing up the ingredients while I was holding him and opening his mouth!
I don't know why but at a certain point I just couldn't hold back the tears any longer. What the hell? I couldn't stop sobbing. I suppose it was because I was such an important part of bean's life until now in as much as I had kept him alive all by myself for the 14 months that he has existed (9 months + 5 outside the womb!) I'd tried so hard to eat the right things while pregnant and eat enough and also I have exclusively breastfed up until this day. I now feel as though I'm not as important, I'm not his only lifeline. He's getting more independent. All of this just made me well up and explode! Being such an important part of his life had made me stronger as a person. I did everything with him and his wellbeing in mind. I never drank even a sip of alcohol, I ate my greens, I lived for him.
Today he ate his broth. He loved it. His face was covered with it as he still doesn't know how to eat off a spoon properly yet but it made it more enjoyable! He was trying to suck and lick and kept spitting out a lot of the liquid, he was even sniffing some up his nose. I can honestly say though that he looked satisfied after his first solids. He had a bit of grated pear for dessert but he was so tired after trying to eat he just went all fussy and wanted some Mummy milk and to sleep. I don't ever want to forget those little expressions on his face whilst eating his first broth! They were priceless. I wish he'd stop growing up so fast.

Baby boy's first Christmas

Well it's been very hectic lately that I haven't had chance to write for a while. I'm so sorry as I'd love to write a lot more often than I do, there are always so many things that Flavio does that I'd love to write about but there's never enough time!

It was Flavio's first Christmas and we spent it with his Grandparents this year. Christmas in a snowy atmospheric England was definitely worth every minute. Grandma had bought a Santa's little helper 'Chief Elf' suit that baby looked gorgeous in and also a 'My first Christmas' red suit with matching hats.

You beamed out happiness and I'm just so glad that you are a well loved baby, Flavio, Mummy is forever looking out for you and putting you before anyone and anything in her life because she knows how important it is for a child to receive the right amount of affection and attention and this Christmas was dedicated to you! The star of the event! You received many carefully thought gifts including books that Mummy has already started to read to you and you take delight in listening to and a Whinnie the Pooh crawler that encourages you to follow him as he crawls around! Mummy doesn't want you to ever be spoilt but wants to make sure you have the right input to stimulate your creative and intellectual growth. I can see what a bright baby you are and your little personality is already starting to develop. You're feisty and passionate but so cuddly and well behaved most of the time! I love your little giggle that you do for Mummy more than anyone else when she tickles your neck or makes a silly noise. Daddy gets a giggle or two too sometimes. I'm so proud of how well you are developing and growing and I know it is all happening too fast. You're my little baby and always will be!!! You liked the tree lights this Christmas and you tried to reach for the branches when I held you near the tree. You enjoyed watching the Popcorn song on Granddad's computer sat on his knee and squealed and smiled with glee. You always like being in England as if you sense the tranquillity in the air. Sometimes it's hard work for Mummy on her own in Rome because she dedicates so much of her time on you that cooking and cleaning become quite difficult but she gets round it, you just sense that she's more serene in England. Well what can I say, just that at 4 months of age your favourite hobby is standing up! You even stand on your own when supported by something, it's amazing! You're a big strong boy and just so lovely. Mummy and Daddy are completely smitten!

lots of love,
 Mummy